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We Say Goodbye to Patches August 20, 2009

Posted by texasheartland in Animals, cats, family, Feelings, life, thoughts.
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I regret to inform all of you that Patches, Mom’s 4-year-old and Smokie’s cat, passed away unexpectedly this evening. She didn’t show any signs, and we’re all shocked beyond belief.

She was from Smokie’s 2nd litter and for some reason when we decided that Smokie’s kittens needed good homes, nobody wanted Patches. I couldn’t figure out why- hell, she entertained herself. But, we decided to keep her. Patches and Mom grew close and because best friends. Patches was quirky and really weird sometimes. She wasn’t always healthy and often had skin irritations, but she always bounced back. Her and Smokie, during the Fall and Winter months, would always race back and forth from room to room early in the morning while we were all asleep. How do I know that?  They didn’t give it a second thought to jump on the bed. Like Smokie when she was little, she too would scale curtains. Patches was a jumpy cat, but that’s what made it so funny- she would be sleeping, someone would pet her, and she would jump a mile high. One time, she jumped from the shelf to on top of the television and skated right off. It was like the videos you would see on America’s Funniest Videos.

After everything we’re going through, this put me, Manders, and especially Mom over the edge. We don’t know if we can truly handle everything. Patches was only about a month away from turning 5 years old. We will forever miss her for she was a special kitty.

Smokie Talking to Patches

Smokie Talking to Patches

Funny Cat Quotes April 10, 2009

Posted by texasheartland in Animals, cats, family, fun, funny, hilarious, humor, life, Quotes, random, thoughts.
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I know I’m posting a lot, but I am completely bored not to mention that I am not even tired yet. But if anyone follows me on Twitter, they know that I tend to post funny or humorous quotes just to make someone’s day a little brighter. I wanted to post a cat quote before bed on Twitter and decided to make ya’lls night (or day!) a little brighter with quotes about our furry friends- cats.

“Cats aren’t clean, they’re just covered with cat spit.” – John S. Nichols

“No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens.”- Abraham Lincoln

“People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.” – Faith Resnick

“We humans are indeed fortunate if we happen to be chosen to be owned by a cat.” -Unknown

“In a cat’s eye, all things belong to cats.” – English proverb

“Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will piss on your computer.” – Bruce Graham

“A cat can purr its way out of anything.”- Donna McCrohan

“Those who will play with cats must expect to be scratched.” – Cervantes

“Cats always seem so very wise, when staring with their half-closed eyes. Can they be thinking, “I’ll be nice, and maybe she will feed me twice?”-Bette Midler

“Cats don’t bark and act brave when they see something small in fur or feathers, they kill it. Dogs tend to bravado. They’re braggarts. In the great evolutionary drama the dog is Sergeant Bilko, the cat is Rambo.” –James Gorman

“The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.” –W. C. Fields

To a cat, “NO!” means “Not while I’m looking” — Unknown

“If cats had opposable thumbs, they would have no need of humans.” – Toby

“To assume a cat is asleep is a grave mistake. He can close his eyes and keep both his ears awake.” – Aileen Fisher

“No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch.” ~Leo Dworken

“When you are looking, a cat acts like a princess, but the minute they think you are not looking, a cat acts like a fool.” K.C. Buffington

“The cat is above all things, a dramatist.”- Margaret Benson

It’s A Christmas Miracle! December 20, 2008

Posted by texasheartland in Christmas, family, funny, holidays, life, random, thoughts.
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I can actually wrap a decent present!

Yesterday, me and the fam went out for some last-minute Christmas shopping where I found Manders’ gift as well as my dad’s present. I knew they were going to be somewhere in between a cinch and grinch to wrap. It all depended on how good of a wrapper you are. Like I’ve said before, I will not be getting a job as an elf anytime soon.

After we got the lights back on from the exploding substation (come to find out, only 1 wire was the cause of a domino-effect that left over 8,000 residents without power on a freakin’ Friday Night!), I decided that after I posted a blog, I was going to wrap presents.

Manders was in the bedroom so I had to wrap on the floor. Naturally, Smokie got in the middle and tried to shred the paper as I was cutting it. She pawed at the bows, and bit the paper. I decided to wrap Manders’ present first because it was the biggest and required the most attention because the edges were sharp. About, I guess, 30 minutes later (told you I’m not good), I was finished. Top off with a little silver bow and some purple ribbon, it was festive enough to even make Santa jealous! Ok, so I’m lying. But atleast the paper is flat and there aren’t any holes!

Next was my dad’s. Now, I’m used to wrapping boxes. Not DVD cases. Let’s hope he doesn’t care what the back looks like. There’s tape and folds, and I think maybe a scratch or two where the taped instantly adhered to the surface. Yes, I am a ripper. If the tape isn’t where it’s supposed to be, I will try to take it off. I’m thinking of putting his DVD in a box. Maybe it’ll look better.

But still, I wrapped a decent present!

Rules For The Cat October 19, 2008

Posted by texasheartland in Animals, cats, family, funny, humor, Pets, random.
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To my beloved cat:

You have been part of this family for a while. But, I must remind you: I have been here longer! Here a few rules I feel you need reminding of:

The bathroom sink is not a water fountain. You have your own water. Whatever comes out of that sink is for washing hands. Not your mouth.

The carpet or clothes on the floor do not substitute as a kitty litter box. If I clean it out everyday, please have enough respect to use it.

The food bowl on the floor is yours and yours alone. Placing a paw in a human’s plate does not mean to claim that as yours.

Chasing your playmates across the hallway is just perfectly fine. But knocking items off the nightstands will only get you into trouble. Remember: floor = good, nightstand = bad.

It is okay to sleep on the bed or at the foot of the bed. Even a pillow that is at the side of me or above me is okay to sleep on. I may even occassionally allow you to sleep in my spot. But to take up all of the room is just ludicrous! I have to sleep somewhere too! And believe it or not, your species are adaptable in curling into little balls. I’ve seen it happen!

I will not pay attention to your every whim, especially when I am in the middle of something or in the restroom. Which brings up another point: There is no need to follow me to the restroom every time. Unless you can use the toilet, then there is no need for you to be in there whilst I am.

Do NOT intimidate the younger felines! They are not impressed, and will only be scared of you. The minute you go to swipe them, you’ll get a swipe back. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Pawing me at 4 in the morning is not a good wake up call. I will not only wake up, I will pick you up, set you outside of the room, close the door and go back to bed. If you have food, water, and a clean litter box, there is no need for me to get up that early.

Finding ways to escape from the house is not a bright idea. If you are not caught within 5 minutes of “freedom”, you will receive a bath. End of story.

These rules are in no way meant for you to get upset and leave a nice little present in the middle of the bed. Always remember: I wuv you!

Love,
Your Human

Sad but true… August 6, 2008

Posted by texasheartland in Animals, cats, family, Pets, random, thoughts.
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I regret to tell ya’ll that my house won’t be hearing the meows of little kittens. I’m saddened to say that Smokie has had a miscarriage. We’re not sure when, but it’s true. It’s kind of depressing to me because I love seeing Smokie as a mother. I know Smokie is depressed as well. She has been melancholy and wants constant attention. Experts say that cats aren’t saddened when one of their kittens are given away to good homes or have miscarriages. But that’s not true. Smokie “cries” every now and then and it breaks my heart to see her upset. I know she’s just a cat but we have a special bond…

…It all started right after high school graduation. We had just moved into the house 2 years before and didn’t have any pets. Mom decided that it was time to get a pet, and we’re cat lovers. We already knew what kind of pet we wanted. So she let me and my sister EACH pick out a kitten. so we went to this guy’s place who had 2 kittens he was wanted to give away. Their conditions were HORRIBLE. It was mid-July, and they were stuck in a little shack. Temperatures were reaching 100 and they only had water. They had wood shavings and wood chips to live on. He opened the door and these 2 tiny kittens came tumbling out. They were so small, they fit in the palm of your hand. A couple of days later, Smokie’s sister died and Smokie wasn’t doing too well. We thought she would die as well. I nursed her back to health and during that time, we bonded greatly…

I know why she had the miscarriage. She’s getting too old to have kittens. Sad to think about. Sad, but true.,

Was that necessary? July 8, 2008

Posted by texasheartland in family, humor, life, Pets, random.
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I wasn’t feeling well last night so I took some sinus medicine and went to bed early. As I drift off to dream land, I feel Smokie get on my side and start kneading. Keep in mind she’s pregnant so she’s going to be doing this a lot. That doesn’t bother me. It’s actually very soothing and felt pretty damn good. I mean, a free massage by a cat. I guess Smokie didn’t want me to be asleep. Just as I hit REM stage, I hear this meow. Right in my ear. I turn my head to her direction and she’s just sitting there. I can imagine her saying “That’s right. Wake up and pay attention to me damnit!”. Even though I am not even 5% awake, I take her to my sister and tell Smokie “Here, love on her.”.  Of course that didn’t work and she came right back to where she was. Needless to say, I just let her be and went back to sleep. But was it necessary to make a racket during sleep?